Hello world!May 27, 2021
Concepts are descriptions of what was and what might be. They have their purpose, but they are not useful for releasing. We need feelings, tensions and emotional reactions, not concepts if we want things to move.
You cannot be a procrastinator. A window is glass and it’s always glass. Same with any object. The truth is that you sometimes don’t do something that you beleive you should do. There are plenty of other things that you cannot start doing fast enough.
Focusing on a concept like ‘procrastination’ keeps us stuck forrever. We think about it, we ruminate, we Google and nothing changes. It might even get worse as we create the identity of a proccrastinator.
There’s a another quite devisive little mental trick going on here: 1. we feel bad because of what we haven’t done and/or what we fear we won’t do 2. We seach for a solution 3. We find some a person, course or technique, or we imagine that we do the task happily after we have been for a walk/had a coffee/tidied up/called a friend. 4. Then we start feeling good, by imagining it’s going to be easy to do the taks tomorrow or later on, we have released some pleasure neurotransmitters and the fear has gone. 5. We then do the distraction but the happiness doesn’t last because when we return to the task, it’s not easy like we thought it would be, in fact it’s worse. 6. At this point, we might invent another plan which we truly believe will make the task easy next time – tomorrow or after some other task or event ha passed and we get some pleasure from this imagination because the fear goes away, but all we’ve done is enered a classic adiction cycle, full of pain-fantasy-pain.
The truth is, there are things that have an emotional charge, that you don’t want to do because of that charge and no amount of planning and imagining will make it easy. When we don’t do what need to do, we are vile to ourselves and in doing so, we create more emotional charge – another layer of fear, of the task itself and now about ourselves and how we can’t trust ourselves. Layers and layers of avoidance and reaction make life very difficult.
If we are forced by circumstance to act, we can do so – often with surprising ease. But while the mind is looping in procrastination, action becomes more and difficult.
Are you trying to control time? Are you battling with time? Do you fear time? The more difficult and tempestuous your relationship with anything is, the more it controls you.
I wake up in the morning and I plan how I will run out of time. It’s aleady in consciousness that you simply won’t get done what you want to get done.
Not having time to do the things you really want to do, yet wasting time on YouTube or whatever you use. There’s no logic to this. While we aren’t logical, I still smell a rat.
When we say ‘I don’t have time to do that’ I mean, ‘I would rather be doing something else.’
All of these behaviours suggest fear is working away undeneath.
No more analysis, can you just welcome the tension that is here and now, connected with these ideas. Could you welcome the tension related to your apparent history wth this? No matter how palpable it feels, it is still a memory.
No intention of doing it
Allow yourself to have no intention of doing what you should do, and no intention of fixing procractination. Could you allow yourself to just no bother?
See what comes up. Can you allow yourself to be as attached to this task and as repelled by it as you are? Can you just allow that? Can you enjoy the reistance to it, just because it’s here?
If I am using fantasies to avoid to pain. Fantasies of future success, an improved ‘me’ that allows me to forget something that is happening right now, I have created a problem. How can I ever do the thing that is going to make me great again? If I do, I risk discovering that my fanatsy is just that. Much better not to riak it. Procrastination with hope in place is far better than discovering that I am completely fucked.
We can release on the fear and this is much easier if we pull the fantasy apart, but by bit. What are you hoping for? Release that. What will happen if you don’t do what you are intending to do? Release that.
Imagine the worst possible scenario and release. We have had enough of pollyanna, it’s not helping.
Still ‘just’ emotions
These are still just emotions and that means that they can be released, moment by moment. We can also realease on what you believ you need to be or do be loved, to survive.